never mind

there it is.

the shiny silky smooth healed up wounds,

oozing out with every beat of my heart,

with every beat it flows,

a somber symphony of agony echoing through my being.

fuck.

what do I do now?

stare blankly at it until it heals again?

will it ever heal again?

( I've been here too many times to not know the answer to that. )

why am I my worst enemy and best foe?

all at the same time.

i should patch it up, right?

its the right thing to do.

but god, 

grant me the strength,

because what's left,

it's only enough for patching this up,

not for continuing this agonizing life.

please.

laying in a puddle,

aisha.